A (Much Needed) Life Update

It's been quite a while since I last updated my blog. I was just going to leave it alone and move on, but there are too many exciting things happening in my life to not share. God has been doing amazing things in my life recently. Just today, I got accepted into the UCF College of Education internship program. Starting in January, I'll be interning in an elementary school classroom twice a week. I'm both excited and nervous for this opportunity. It's hard to believe that this is my fourth year in college. In just one more year, I'll be graduated and starting to mold the minds of future America. I pray every day that God will give me the wisdom and guidance to know what to do and how to approach the obstacles I know will be thrown in my way. I love teaching and children, but it's daunting to think I'll soon be in my own classroom. I just have to trust in Him and know He won't let me fail if it's meant to be.

The new school year has also started some great new relationships and ended some not-so-great ones in my life. I finally listened to what God and my family was telling me and ended my relationship with Matt. It was hard, but after a lot of prayer I realized it was the right thing to do. We are and always have been on different life paths with different beliefs and it was better to end it now than to prolong something that would not have worked out. I thank God for giving me the strength to end it and for helping me find happiness again. Speaking of happiness, I've started a few new great friendships. My neighbors are a group of awesome guys who have been better friends than I could have ever asked for. They're all so protective and kind and are always there when I need to talk or vent or just let off some stress. It's great just being able to step out my door and be at their place. The boys and their friends have helped me get out of the apartment more than I did all last year. They're all great and I can't thank them enough for their friendship (and shoulders to cry on when I need them).

My living situation this year is also fantastic. I moved in with two of my best friends and our "random" roommate is terrific. She's quickly becoming one of my new best friends as well. She's always there to listen and give me much needed life advice. I can't really think of any complaints about her or my other roommates so far.

All in all, my year has been perfect so far. I can't thank God enough for everything that has happened (both good and bad) because without all of it, I wouldn't be smiling every day.

Overcoming Insecurities and the Person Helping Me Do It

Everyone has insecurities. Some people think they're too tall, others feel too short, some don't like the way their teeth are aligned, and others try to change their voice.

My insecurity is easily hidden most of the year but living in Florida, one season is hard to escape. Summer. I dread the heat flashes almost as much as I dread the words "beach" and "bikini". I've never liked the way I look in a bathing suit. My childhood scoliosis has caused one hip bone to fall slightly higher than the other, pushing my weight a little off center. Most people wouldn't notice it, but I'm not most people. In the past, I've overcome my insecurity by hiding my sides under a tankini. This is me two summers ago.

As I've grown older, not wearing a bikini has made me stand out more than I would if I wore one, so I've avoided the beach and pool altogether. My plan to avoid water activities this summer was working perfectly until Matt came into my life. The other night, we randomly started talking about what makes us feel insecure and I mentioned not liking the pool. He laughed at first, but then realized I was being serious and told me he thinks I'm perfect and since he's my boyfriend, his opinion is the only one that should matter. Sweet, but untrue. Unable to convince me I'm fine the way I am, he decided to make a workout and meal plan for the fall. He vowed to push me until I'm content with myself, no matter how angry or frustrated I get. I'm pretty sure he wouldn't stop helping me workout even if I threatened to break up with him. He's forcing me to take a look at myself and be happy with what I see. It's going to be a challenge and it could make or break our relationship, but he's just trying to show me that he cares and I might just be looking forward to the experience.

Wednesday HodgePodge

1. Do you and your family enjoy camping? What do you enjoy most/like the least when it comes to family camping? When was the last time you camped?

- My family and I used to go camping at the Disney campgrounds once every year or so. That's about as much camping as we ever did. The best part about camping at Disney is the indoor plumbing that exists just a short walk from your tent. You get to sleep outside, roast marshmallows, and enjoy family time without having to find your own place to relieve yourself. Camping outside of Disney isn't really something high on my to do list. I'd much rather stay in a hotel with air conditioning.

2. Did you attend a summer camp when you were a kid? Is that a happy or not so happy memory?

- Once I entered middle school, I attended church camp for a week each July. That week was something I looked forward to all year long. It was a chance to get away with my best friends and spend some quality time with both them and God. I had a special rock I'd go to each morning and evening to do my devotionals. I miss that rock and the peace it gave me. Once I started high school, I also attended band camp each summer. Band camp was a different story. Eight hours in the Florida heat each day was not something I ever looked forward to. Sweating, getting ordered around, and rarely being allowed to talk wasn't exactly fun, but it was necessary and helped me make some great memories.

3. Over the course of your life, what have you probably spent more time pondering than anything else?

- I spend a lot of time thinking about the future. What is planned for me and what I will be able to accomplish. The biggest thing I ponder is probably the "with whom?" as in "who will I be with? Who will I marry?"

4. Which of the seven natural wonders of the world would you most like to see? There are many lists of 'wonders' but this is the standard natural wonder list-Mount Everest, The Great Barrier Reef, The Grand Canyon, Victoria Falls, The Harbor of Rio de Janerio, Paricutan Volcano and The Northern Lights.

- I've had the privilege of seeing the Grand Canyon once a few years ago. It was absolutely magnificent. I'd love to have the opportunity to see the Great Barrier Reef before it gets destroyed, which is bound to happen relatively soon. I'm slightly afraid of sharks though, so snorkeling near the reef may be challenging.

5. What was your first real job?

- I've babysat since I was around 13 and I worked at my dad's office during the summers when I was younger, but the first legitimate paycheck I received was from First United Methodist Preschool.

6. Lemonade or Sweet tea...which do you prefer on a hot summer day?

- Arnold Palmers! I've always been too lazy to make my own and I never get the correct tea to lemonade ratio, but my boyfriend recently introduced me to Arizona Tea's Arnold Palmer and it's perfect.

7. What is something that always brings a smile to your face?

- A hug from a friend I haven't seen in a while. I love those running hugs friends give each other after a long summer apart or even just a weekend in separate places. It's wonderful.

8. Insert your own random thought here.

- Oh sweet summertime, I'm more than ready for you to be over. Don't get me wrong, I love lounging around as much as the next girl, but too much isn't healthy. I'm ready to be back in class, in Orlando, with my friends.

HodgePodge

I've skipped a few hodgepodges lately and it's time to get back into them.

1. Have you ever been to the capital of the USA-Washington DC? If so what's your favorite site? If not, what site would you most like to see on a visit to that city someday in the future? Is it even on your list of places to visit?

- I've been a few times and I love it. I love all of the Smithsonian museums. The artifacts they have are absolutely amazing and I really want to go back soon. I wish I could find some old pictures from our family visits, but alas, they have yet to be scanned onto our desktop.

2. When did you last attend a wedding? Are there any weddings on your summer calendar? Were you a summer bride? If you're single is summer the season of your dream wedding?

- The last wedding I attended was in February. My godbrother John married a sweet Southern girl named Sarah Grace.

John's younger brother, David, is getting married at the end of July so we're all heading back up to Alabama for that towards the end of the month. I'm a sucker for weddings so I'm extremely excited. As for me, I'd rather get married in late fall/early winter. I despise the summer heat and can't imagine trying to take pictures outside in a full length gown in the middle of the summer. I'd rather brave a little cold air than sweat through my dress.

3. What is your favorite way to eat strawberries?

- Strawberry shortcake. My grandma makes a cake that is to die for! Just thinking about it has made me hungry.

4. What is one thing you are especially looking forward to this summer?

- My good friends Felix and Julia are traveling to Florida from Germany in July and will be staying in town through the beginning of August. It's been two years since we've seen each other and I cannot wait to catch up, learn some new German phrases, and have an overall good time. I'm not quite sure how we're going to entertain them in T-ville for an entire month, but I'm sure we'll find a way.

5. Do you use/like the self scanner at the grocery store?

- I use it when I only have a couple things to buy. I always end up doing something wrong though, so I might as well wait in the regular line.

6. Share a favorite piece of common sense advice.

- Think before you speak.

I'm still working on that one. Things tend to sound a lot smarter in my head than they do coming out of my mouth.

7. Barefoot, flip flops, tennis shoes, sassy sandal-your first choice for summertime?

- Barefoot! My mom hates it when I walk out without shoes on, but it just feels so good. The second I walk into anyone's house, I toss my shoes in a corner and don't put them back on until we're going somewhere that requires footwear. When I am required to cover my soles, I wear flip flops. I'm not even sure if I own a pair of sneakers that fit...

8. Insert your own random thought here.

- The lazy days of summer have never been so lazy. Today, I didn't get out of bed until around 1 or 2 and I didn't leave the house until 630. I'm enjoying having the opportunity to be lazy because I know, come August, I won't have free time anymore.

Wednesday Hodgepodge

I missed last week's hodgepodge and I refuse to miss another week, so here it goes!!

1) What reveals more about a woman - her refrigerator or her purse?

- Definitely her purse. Everyone's fridge contains nearly the same things, milk, eggs, leftovers, sodas. The only differences are in the labels. But each woman has a different purse that says a lot about her. The contents of my purse would tell you that I like to be prepared, I have asthma, and I carry around nausea medicine for when I get stressed. All of which are good things to know about me. (side note: I took me three tries to spell "refrigerator" correctly. Why does it not contain a "d" if "fridge" does?)

2) When was the last time you visited the zoo? Where? What's your favorite zoo animal?

- Last June, I took Proverbs 31's prince and princess to the Brevard Zoo while she and her husband were out of town. We had a lot of fun! The prince had a million questions for the zoo keepers.

My favorite zoo animal is the elephants. I could spend all day at an elephant exhibit if anyone would let me.

3) What social issue really fires you up?

- Child abuse/neglect.

4) Are you a coupon clipper? Are you extreme?

- I can't remember the last time I used a coupon for something. When I cut out/print coupons, I always end up forgetting to use them.

5) What is one of your favorite souvenirs brought back from your travels?

- My great uncle owns an antique shop in upstate New York. We went to visit him a couple years ago and he took us to his shop and let us look around. He noticed me admiring a hand-beaded pillow from the late 1800s or early 1900s (I can't remember which). When I wasn't paying attention, he took it off the shelf and gave it to my mom to take home. That pillow is definitely cherished and I'm thankful for it. I'm sure my uncle could have gotten a good chunk of change for it but he decided to just give it away to make me smile.

6) Lemon meringue or key lime?

- I'm not a huge fan of either, but if I had to choose I'd say key lime. I can eat it in small amounts, but too much makes my stomach hurt.

7) What is the most beautiful word you know in any language?

love

8) Insert your own random thoughts here.

The end of the school year is approaching quickly. I didn't realize just how much I would miss my kids until now. One of the little boys in my class is leaving early to go on vacation so he had to say goodbye after class today. He gave me and Nichole huge hugs and told us to miss us. He was definitely a handful, but I'll miss him a lot. I don't want to have to say goodbye to the rest of my class next week!!!

The not-so-sweet smells of summer

Summer is supposed to be enjoyed, correct? It seems as if I'm spending most of my summer days wishing it was already fall semester. I'm homesick for UCF (which is a sentiment I welcome with open arms after my experiences freshman year).

Reasons I dislike summer:

1. I actually enjoy learning. I enjoy cracking open a book and trying to wrap my brain around a new concept. Sure, I'll complain while I'm doing it, but I prefer that to sitting around doing nothing.

2. Just because I was born and raised in Florida does NOT mean I enjoy the summer heat. Sitting outside is nearly unbearable. Sure, I could put on a pair of shorts and deal with it, but shorts nowadays aren't particularly appropriate or flattering.

3. Lovebugs. One of the only reasons I ever hate on the University of Florida. Why would you release a bug that was intended to eat mosquitoes when it doesn't? All they do is eat my car paint.

Things I miss about UCF:

1. Getting to see my best friends every day. A lot of my friends are now back home working.

2. Actually having something to do/learn each day.

3. The peace I feel when I look out the windows of the Teaching Academy.

4. Dare I say it? Astronomy class with Elise.

5. Asian Chao and Chick-fil-a. yum!

May the Fourth Be With You (Hodgepodge)

1. Have you ever been served breakfast in bed? Did you enjoy that? If someone were serving you breakfast in bed this coming weekend what would you hope to see on the tray?

- I'm pretty sure I have but I cannot remember when it was. I did sleep at my friend Melissa's a couple weekends ago and I woke up to her boyfriend making us pancakes, which is as close to breakfast in bed as I usually get. (I don't like eating in the morning). If I were getting served breakfast in bed this weekend, I'd love homemade waffles and fresh fruit.

2. What is one piece of advice you would give a new mother?

- I'm not a mom, but I know time goes by quicker than any of us want it to. So I'd tell them to savor every moment they're given with their children and be grateful for what they have. Being a babysitter, I also know it's important to get a night out once in a while, for sanity's sake of course, not for mine.

3. When was the last time you wanted to scream? Explain.

- When I got my final grades yesterday. Screams of joy and relief, I mean. I knew I would pass everything, I just wasn't sure if passing astronomy meant a B- or an A (everything was riding on this last test).

4. Can you hula hoop?

- Absolutely not. I can't jump rope either. I think it's the whole coordination/balance thing. Yesterday, my friend Matt was trying to teach me about his Power Balance bracelet. He wanted me to stand on one foot and try not to fall when he pushed on my arms.... yeah right. I fell before he even touched me. So no, I can't balance a hula hoop on my hips.

5. What is something people do in traffic that really bothers you?

- Tailgating. Definitely tailgating. I'm the kind of person who will drive no more than 5 mph over the speed limit when I'm on my way to school. If the road is empty, I go in the fast lane, if it's not I drive on the right. I get extremely frustrated when people come into the right lane and tailgate me when the left lane is completely empty. 99% of the time I'll slow down just to make them angry.

6. What do you do when people don't admit they're wrong?

- I try not to give people a hard time about that. Unless they're wrong about a homework problem or something. I'm an extremely stubborn person who doesn't like to admit she's wrong, so I understand where they're coming from most of the time.

7. What is the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word 'fun'?

- Honestly? The Spongebob song. "F is for friends who do things together. U is for you and me. N is for anywhere and anytime at all down here in the deep blue sea." I have no excuse for that one because none of the kids I watch are allowed to watch it.... I suppose I can blame my brothers.

8. Insert your own random thought here.

- I realized how much of a mom/preschool teacher I am yesterday. I was at my friend's dinner party and someone spilled spaghetti sauce on their (white) shirt when they were cooking. I immediately went over to my bag and whipped out my Tide-to-go. My friend then peered into the pocket it came out of and laughed at me because the contents of that pocket included various pens and pencils, scrap paper, handinaps from Sonny's, and maybe a crayon. Normal single, childless 20-year-olds do not carry that sort of thing around every day.